Deep Thought of the Week Archive

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	2-22-2001
I think one way the cops could make money would be to hold a murder weapons sale. Many people could really use used ice picks.
	1-27-2001
I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.
	1-12-2001
I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.
	12-24-2000
I can't stand cheap people. It makes me real mad when someone says something like, "Hey, when are you going to pay me that $100 you owe me?" or "Do you have that $50 you borrowed?" Man, quit being so cheap!
	11-13-2000
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
	10-25-2000
I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"
	9-19-2000
Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see.
	9-14-2000
Whether they find a life there or not, I think Jupiter should be called an enemy planet.
	7-23-2000
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.

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